Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Mirrors tell us about ourselves.  We check them to see how we look and sometimes even feel.  My daddy used to put me in front of one when I was pouting and would show me how silly I looked!  It has been fun to watch the twins.  The mirror each other every day.  One of them will do something, like wave bye-bye and then the other will watch and seem to say, "Oh, we can do that?"  Then they will copy it on cue!  We learn so much about ourselves by our reflection. 

I am in the middle of a Biblical Counseling Training Course called Extrodinary Woman and it has reminded me again that our self concept, identity and sense of fulfillment is built over time by our mirrored reflections.  What our parents, peers, teachers, or others give us a sense of who we are.  By far the parent-child relationship is the most influencial influence on a child.  Even as an adult, many find themselves seeking their parents approval, desiring to hear that they are special, talented, smart or loved.  If you were blessed to have loving parents who took opportunities to tell you how fearfully and wonderfully you were made, you are probably pretty secure and confident in who you are and what your purpose is.  On the other hand, if you were not so fortunate and had unprepared, ungodly, unavailable or unloving parents your self concept was not based in the truth of who you were made to be.  It could be that your reflection mirrored back at you is a lot like looking into a fun house mirror that stretches, distorts or warps your perception of yourself.  I haven't even mentioned abuse which can further damage one's self image and leaves the abused feeling unvaluable or ruined beyond repair.

The Bible tells us over and over that we were made in God's image. Genesis 1:27 says, So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

Ephesians 4:24 tells us, "and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness."

When we spend time with the Father it is like looking into that mirror to see who we are meant to be.   We can study His Word and learn even more about ourselves. 

We are told that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), are a reward (Psalm 127:3), loved (John 3:16), accepted (Romans 15:7), chosen (Ephesians 1:4), important and have confident access in Him (Ephesians 3:12), taken care of (Philippians 4:19), and complete (Colossians 2:10) just to name a few!!!

James 1:22-24 says, Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.

Beloved, do not forget who you are; you are valuable to God.  Value is determined by price, therefore you are worth the sacrifice of His Son, Jesus.  Jesus paid the ultimate price for you determining your infinite worth to the Father!

I love this quote from a Study on "Who I am to God", by Kenneth Boa, "The more we embrace these truths from Scripture who we have become in Christ, the more stable, grateful, and fully assured we will be in this world." (http://bible.org/article/who-does-god-say-i-am)

I pray God will remind you who you are to Him today.  I pray, those of us with children will not take for granted the priviledge of telling our little blessings who they are created to be.  I pray that those of us struggling with our self concepts or images will look to Father for the truth about our identity. 

Was it really Eve's fault????

We have started a 'Read the Bible in a Year' plan with the kids.  I thought it would be pretty cool for them to be able to say that they have read the whole Bible and pretty cool for us to be able to say we read it to them.  You naturally start in Genesis 1: "In the Beginning....".  We read through creation days 1 to 6, God resting on the 7th.  Chapter 2 speaks of the Garden and where he put man.  Then I noticed something for the first time in this very familiar text.  In Genesis 2:16-17 God gives the command to Adam not to eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.  Wait a minute, where is Eve?  She is the one who disobeys and is 'tricked' by Satan to break God's command.  We tend to pin the entire fall of man on Eve, but think about it, she wasn't even created until God puts Adam into a deep sleep and forms her from his rib in verse 22! 

When we read on to Chapter 3 we see Eve falling for the trick, "Did God really say, You must not eat from it?"  She eats, gives it to Adam- he eats, and get this...."He was WITH HER!"  (verse 6)  They sew together a quick covering from fig leaves, then they hid from God.  When God confronts them they point at each other, Adam blames 'the woman' and the woman says 'the devil made me do it!'  They are equally punished and equally held accountable.  Finger pointing doesn't work with the God of all Creation.

I think it is safe to say that when we don't fulfill our God defined roles we are open to falling.  God made everything with order, including limits and boundaries.  Man was created to rule and subdue the creation God had made and was told to obey it God's way. Woman was made to help man with the monumental task.  God called it all good.  It was not a flawed plan, it was good.  God called them one flesh and (saw them equal) with different roles.  The Husband loves, leads and protects wife; wife submits and respects husband. (Ephesians 5:22-33)

Submission can bite us in the modern day.  Women don't even really like to say the word, type it, or especially discuss it!  I am about as strong willed as the Lord makes them and I was raised by a very  independent woman and passive father.  Submission was as foreign of a concept to me as nuclear science and yet, I have made peace with it :) 

God's design for the man-woman relationship is good.  Man is the one who distorts it.  I had a boyfriend in college who pretended to be godly.  He took me to church with him on Sunday like a good boy and proceeded to sin the rest of the week.  He would sit in the pew and point with authority and gloat to Ephesians 5:22, 'Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.'  He would scold me for not being submissive and obedient.  It never even occurred to me that he wasn't my husband and I wasn't a wife yet!  After I moved onto a healthy relationship and did become a godly wife, I was totally against the concept of submission because of the distortion it had become to me.  As I matured I was surprised by the following verses of Ephesians 5 detailing the relationship of husband and wife, especially the husband's role.  (You see, I never got that far before, because I would slam the Bible closed at the first part!) 

Ephesians 5:23- 31 says, "For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.  Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.  In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies.  He who loves his wife loves himself.  After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds it and cares for it, just as Christ does the church--for we are members of his body.  For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."

God sees us as equal in the husband-wife relationship.  He calls the woman to submit, because that was the design.  It doesn't mean she isn't smart enough or strong enough.  We were designed to do different things and in different ways, yet called to unity and wholeness as a couple.  When we are standing face to face with the Lord and He asks us "Why did you........?" finger pointing isn't going to get us out of it!

I have had many women ask me questions like these:

"Do I really have to submit to my husband?"  No, you don't. BUT, when you don't you leave yourself open for the craftiness of the enemy, just as Eve did.

"What if he won't lead and I have nothing to submit to?" Pray. Ask God to help you take a step back so that your husband can take the step forward. Pray that the passive nature our culture has bred into our boys and feminism into our girls will be overcome with the Truth.

1 Peter 3:1-2 says, "Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives."

"Do I have a say at all or am I subject to his every whim?"  Yes, you have a say, but he has the final decision.  God made you a team.  He fully expects you to share your thoughts and opinions with your husband.  We are not called to be doormats, but to be support to our husband.  1 Corinthians 11:11-12 says, "In the Lord, however, woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman.  For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman.  But everything comes from God."

Submission may be the dirty word in our world today, but with God's help we can understand it, apply it and strengthen our marriage by returning to God's original design for husband and wife, and it is very good.

Unplug 2 Connect.......

 Recently our church held a Sacred Assembly.  It was a powerful day full of worship, reflection and prayer.  One of the events of the day was the reading of the Book of Mark.   As I heard the words spoken out loud something kept standing out to me......Jesus went alone....to a solitary place.....he withdrew.

During that day I had several different people come to me and ask for prayer to help them connect with God, find more time to be still, or just plain hear Him better.  I was thinking to myself  as I ended with "Amens" hopefully God understand that meant for me as well, because I need it just as much as the next person.  We all struggle with balancing the demands of life and our spiritual life.  If you don't then you are better than Jesus!  I mean that, seriously.  Let me prove it to you the best way I know how, with Scripture:

Mark 1:35, Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.

Mark 6:30-31,  The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught.  Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

Mark 6:46, After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray.

Matthew 5:1, Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down.

Matthew 13:1-2, That same day Jesus went out of the house and sat by the lake.  Such large crowds gathered around him that he got into a boat and sat in it, while all the people stood on the shore.

Matthew 14:13, When Jesus heard what had happened (beheading of John the Baptist), he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place. Hearing of this, the crowds followed him on foot from the towns.

Matthew 14:22-23,  Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd.  After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone.

Matthew 26:36, Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.”

Luke 5:16,  But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

Luke 9:18, Once when Jesus was praying in private and his disciples were with him, he asked them, “Who do the crowds say I am?”

I have to say that I am very blessed by these verses.  Especially Mark 6 where it says Jesus was in such demand they didn't even have time to eat!  The other day I was doing schoolwork with the children, cooking lunch, prepping dinner, cleaning the house, taking care of the babies and answering the other 5 kids demands.  The hours just flew by and before I knew it, it was time to load up in the car for hockey practice.  I ran out the door with my lunch in my hand that I had never had the time to sit down and eat.  I was so thankful I had a teenager to drive so I could eat my salad at 5:30pm in the car!!!!

I'd like to suggest based on these Scriptures that Jesus knew a thing or two about how to connect with the Father.  He withdrew, went off, alone, by himself, or left to pray.  Jesus didn't have the electronic revolution to deal with like we do now, but I know if he did his behavior would be the same, for he is the same yesterday, today and forever. (And it would still be exactly what we need!!!)  UNPLUG to connect, that is what he would demonstrate and say.  "Come with me to a quite place and find rest."

What this will look like for you will be as different as your circumstances, but the answer will still be UNPLUG to connect.  Whether you are a child growing in the ways of the Lord, UNPLUG to connect.  If you are a teenager in the throws of hormones and friendships, UNPLUG to connect.  If you are a young adult trying to find your way and callings, UNPLUG to connect.  Maybe you are a new mother trying to adjust to the needs of your bundle of joy or a seasoned mother managing the brood, UNPLUG to connect.  If you're days are coming and going as fast as the commuter train, UNPLUG to connect.  If you are an empty nester enjoying the freedom and enjoying the fruits of your labor, UNPLUG to connect.  No matter the season we are in, the answer is still the same....."Life comes with distractions and time fillers sooooooo.......UNPLUG to connect"!

God calls us to an intimate, undistracted time of personal relationship (however long you are able He will bless.)  His desire is just to BE with you and you with Him.  Jesus demonstrated it so we could learn the simple truth that when we UNPLUG we will connect.

Got Sleep?

I love babies and recently one of my very closest friends gave birth to a healthy baby boy.  I went up to the hospital to see her and she looked beautiful and glowing, but exhausted.  I remember those sleepless nights.  I especially remember them after we brought the twins home from the hospital just last year.  I remember how we had to feed them 1.5 oz. of milk at a time (OH SO SLOWLY....).  It took them 45 minutes to finish a bottle and by the time I finished with both of them I got to rest my eyes for 15 minutes before #1 was ready for the next feeding!!!   I see mommies at our twin support group come in with bloodshot eyes and desperate faces, wondering "Will I EVER get sleep again?"

It is draining being a new parent no matter how many babies you bring home.  One little blessing can turn a house upside down quicker than you can say "Cafe Latte, please!"  When it is your first child you can also expect to experience the loss of independence and freedom life held before you held your little one.  It is a difficult adjustment that continues until you are an empty nester!  It does get easier as time goes by, but being a parent will always mean you consider them with every major decision and most minor ones, too! 

I woke up this morning wondering what God says on the topic.  After all, He is the Perfect Parent, and He has more children than we could even dream of!!! 

So here are a few insights I found in Scripture to encourage all you out there who are pacing the halls in the wee hours of the night: 

God knows what it is like to never sleep!
Psalm 121:1-4, "I lift up my eyes to the hills— where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep."

Children are a blessing from God.
Genesis 33:5, Then Esau looked up and saw the women and children. “Who are these with you?” he asked. Jacob answered, “They are the children God has graciously given your servant.”

God gave you your blessings and He will give you the strength to care for them!
Psalm 68:35, You are awesome, O God, in your sanctuary; the God of Israel gives power and strength to his people. Praise be to God!

This sleepless time is a season and when it is over it will be like water under the bridge!
Job 11:13-16, “Yet if you devote your heart to him and stretch out your hands to him,
if you put away the sin that is in your hand and allow no evil to dwell in your tent,
then you will lift up your face without shame; you will stand firm and without fear.
You will surely forget your trouble, recalling it only as waters gone by.

This verse in Job tells us that no matter what we are going through if we keep our heart pure and focused on the Lord we will get through it, our problem becomes smaller, and over time it will seem insignificant, even though right now it feels ENORMOUS!!! That gives me hope and I hope it encourages you as well!  I can testify that our season of sleeplessness with the twins does feel like water under the bridge.  Likewise with our son David, who is now 8, he didn't sleep from birth until he was 4, yet it feels like a distant memory and we even laugh and tease him about it now.  :)

So be encouraged, this season of sleeplessness is just a season.  Cherish your little one, because in a blink of an eye they won't be so little anymore and you will be sleepless for other reasons, like are they home yet??????

This is Gabe, he wanted his picture in my blog this morning and it was taken during one of our family devotional times when he fell asleep!  Precious!!!