aLL AboArD ThE ROLLer CoaSTEr thAT is mY LiFe!

Okay, so I am not always so strong as I make it seem! This weekend panic hit me that I was 15 weeks and not feeling a baby move yet. I started to feel better and less nauseous, which most people would welcome, but not me. For me it was a sure sign that things were not going well. I spent most of the weekend in deep, deep prayer. I counted down the hours till my appointment on Monday at noon, 36 hours down to 1. I do not want to know how anxious I would have been had I not prayed all weekend, because by the time I walked into the office I was a nervous wreck. My friend Meg called me 10 minutes before my apt. and said, "You in the waiting room? Let's pray!" She prayed for God to let the doctors find the heartbeat quickly this time, to ease my mind, and bring me peace. I, of course agreed with that prayer.

They called my name and I walked back to find out where everything stood. My heart was pounding and my blood was racing. I told the doc that I was nervous and why and she said, "Let's not wait, but hear that heartbeat." She listened and listened. As each minute clicked by the tension grew. I was praying in my head, "Come on God...didn't You hear our prayer 10 minutes ago? Why can't this EVER be easy?" She finally gave up and said she was going to schedule me an ultrasound STAT. I stopped her and asked her if she could please just try listening on my side (remember my dream at 13 weeks?). She said, "Of course. I will do WHATEVER you want!" She put the Doppler on my side and guess what? We heard it....then it disappeared! I smiled and said, "Yep, that is exactly what happened to me last time!" She looked shocked and I explained how God told me in a dream to listen there and that at my last apt. when the doc left the room I picked up the Doppler and heard it for myself. Her jaw was still on the floor at this point and then she started pacing! She kept looking at me in disbelief and said, "We heard it right? I mean your pulse is 97 and this just registered at 135 and 140 on the Doppler. We heard the baby, right? Well Shelli, are you satisfied with that?" I smiled at her and said, " I know we heard the baby, Doctor, but the question is are YOU satisfied?" She said she was, but wanted me to go get the ultrasound anyway.

They called around and gave me a few times and places to choose from. I picked the radiology dept. in McHenry a bit of a drive away. I remembered there was a really sweet ultrasound tech there that I had the privilege to meet during one of our miscarriages. I remembered her to be very kind and compassionate with Mike and I, even crying with us and hugging me as I left. So off I drove hoping she would be there that day.....and she was!

I told Casey why I was there and why I chose to see her that day. She was touched and said, "Enough talk, let's find your baby's heartbeat!" She found it immediately and flipped on the sound so I could see and hear it. She went on to show me the spine, 4 chambers of the heart, bladder, kidneys, legs, arms, fingers and even toes! I asked her if she could see anything else while she was at it.....like what the gender was and to my surprise she saw that too! She smiled and said, "There it is, Shelli. You are now tied 3 & 3, it is a boy!" I instantly cried. How sweet...how special...what a privilege it was to know that we are having another son! I thanked her again and reminded her again that she ROCKS!!!! We said our goodbyes. I was on my way, cell phone in hand, ready to call and share the good news with all those waiting to hear with white knuckles sitting by the phone!

So here is the lesson, Loved Ones.....we pray....God answers. Okay, it is even a bit more than that. God answers His way! And I thank Him for that. If He had answered my way (quick and easy heartbeat) I would have missed the bigger blessing. I needed to see the details of our baby's growth. I needed to know that everything was developing perfectly to have true peace of mind these next few months. God knew that quick just wouldn't cut it for me in the long haul. He answered His way and I was blessed above and beyond.

I know it can sometimes feel like He isn't moving fast enough or hearing us at all....but I am here to tell you that He does hear you and His timing is perfect. Do not give up Dear Ones. Philippians 4:6 tells us to submit EVERYTHING in prayer, that means He can impact EVERYTHING. He hears you....He hears you....He hears you!!!

Psalm 5:3, "In the morning O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation."